I had announced on Twitter that I’d drop a post yesterday, however, I had a case of writers block. Thankfully, today, I woke up and was inspired to write the following post.
Before we get into it though….
My Facebook Page is up & running (still working on a few minor issues on there though), please feel free to like my page here:
As a woman with a particular look & character, it took me until about 2 weeks ago to fully grasp what I am about to say.
Since being out here in Ghana, I have noticed that various males (most predominately being linked to my older brother somehow) have been so keen on wanting to “help me”, find a career job of my choice.
In actual fact, it is not even me that makes them aware that I am even looking for such an opportunity. My older brother (bless his heart) happens to mention this when in conversation with these various individuals, and then they all of a sudden “want to help”, ESPECIALLY when they meet me. Of course, some of them may not even have any links to the industry, but pretend that they do, all in the sake of getting hold of my #
Over the past few weeks, I had noticed that 1 guy in particular was messaging me every morning via Whats App to wish me a “Good Morning” etc. Initially I did not think anything of it, until he began frequently doing so. It got to a point were he was now randomly calling me to “check up on me” & was doing “long time no see” talks on my phone line. These times I had only met him because my brother is a construction worker, and was working on this guy’s house. Of course you’re not going to see me after that, your house has been completed DURRR!!
If you follow me on Twitter, then you know that I have been struggling with the Internet data restrictions out here. Due to this, I tend to only turn on my phones data, when necessary. One evening, I hit the “mobile data” button, and watched on as all my social media notifications rushed through. I decided to check my What’s App messages 1st, and laughed when I saw the following:
“Just wanted to find out if it would be ok for me to take you out? I’m not sure where at the moment but I’m working on it”
Let’s be CLEAR I have ZERO interest in this guy, and will NEVER entertain any such date with him. However, I found it amusing how this guy was probably the 1st guy I met via my brother, who had insisted that he would do everything in his power to “help me” get a career job. Upon all his empty boasts and promises, you’ve instead found yourself messaging me such rubbish?! Laughable.
A few weeks later he began calling my brother multiple times, to inform him that he was currently at another city within Ghana. Upon returning, he would like to meet up with me & introduce me to 1 guy who is apparently in charge of a radio station (1 that I’ve already been to with my brother by the ways, and the outcome of that meeting was interesting to say the least) because of my “job situation”.
There’s no need for me to further indulge in this story, but I can give you other examples of other men trying to use what they think is my “weak spot”, in order for them to try and draw me closer to them. This is the reason why I personally do not go around telling people my personal business. My brother innocently told these individuals because he genuinely thought he was helping his sister out, however, I had to sit him down the other day and thoroughly break down the following:
- I really appreciate him innocently telling his male folks about what I am trying to achieve (as my brother is trying to help). However, it is not everyone that needs to know my dreams and plans. These males try to use this information to their advantage, by having me think that they “care” and just “want to help” me, when really and truly they are trying to worm their way into entering some sort of friendship relationship with me.
- If an opportunity is really for me, then I will either be able to get a hold of it myself, or it will naturally come my way. Constantly telling other people of what I want makes me look desperate. These men will now have it in their heads that because I’m so desperate for an opportunity they can tell me any rubbish and I will just follow them. “Oh meet me at so and so, so that we can go to 1 station”, when really he is trying to take me on a date in hopes that I will fall for him. Nah G. Furthermore, if these types of guys were to even help me get certain opportunities, they would automatically think that I now OWE THEM SOMETHING. My morals are way to high, for me to be sleeping, or dating my way up to the top. F*ck that!
- I had to give him previous examples, including the recent situation with Albert (Can’t Be Cool With The Mandem??) as to why informing these male acquaintances about me, IS NOT A SMART IDEA.
I am not saying that every male thinks, or is this way, HOWEVER I am saying that I would rather avoid such situations. I believe that there are indeed genuine people about, and if such an individual is genuine then God will surely give me signs that this is the case. I am very much for working hard, and allowing blessings to naturally fall my way, rather than relying on morons with nothing to offer, think that they can be apart of my world if they “help me out”. Chale, I don’t need help. I’ve got this & God has got me. When the time is right, I will thoroughly shine, without any man sitting somewhere and saying “It was me that helped her”.
I have spoken. That’s an end to that.