A few days ago, I read a blog post that really touched me. It touched me because, it was how I imagined love to be. It’s not that I haven’t been in love before; I have. Only once. However, how I loved that man, was not how he loved me.
He was the complete opposite to me. I mean, on paper, it actually did not make sense as to why we ended up together. I didn’t care about it not “making sense” at the time though. I saw something in him, that even he did not see within himself.
We met when I was in secondary school. Before my work experience, the radio stations manager, took a picture of me and uploaded it onto their website.
About a week into my placement, Mr. Manager cheekily said:
“You’ve got some admirers. One of them is Joseph. He is coming to the studio later on today!”
“Joseph? Who on earth is Joseph?” I asked curiously.
“Well, he is a young chap that finished his work experience about a week before you started yours. He saw your picture, and fell in love”, he replied, with an annoying grin on his face. This made my skin crawl.
I attended an all girls secondary school. Outside of school, I had ZERO interest in boys (apart from B2K obviously!)
When I was out and about with my girls, guys would approach everyone in our group, except me. I was the “dead-ting” that would wait for guys to finish churpsing (chatting up) my girls, so that we could continue our journey home (we all lived locally to each other).
In primary school, I was always teased for being fat, ugly, dark-skinned with “big tits”. Mentally, I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to think I was “pretty”. Also, that particular picture on the stations website was “cringe-worthy,” in my opinion. As far as I was concerned, whoever this Joseph guy was, clearly had eyesight problems.
I was sat in the studio listening to the stations jingles, when I heard the studio door open. I turned around, assuming that it was Mr. Manager.
A tall, skinny, dark-skinned guy, wearing all white Adidas from head to toe, entered with a smile.
“Who is this?” I mentally asked myself, however, I actually did not bother to ask him. It wasn’t long before Mr. Manager popped in and made it known that it was Joseph.
I didn’t really have a “type”, as at the age of 15, I was an inexperienced child. When I saw Joseph, nothing came to mind at all. I did not feel a damn thing.
I started conversing with him. He told me his opinions about the work placement, and let me know that he made music. I’ve always been someone that asks a lot of questions, so within 10 minutes, we were talking like we’d known each other for years. Abruptly, he started to roll up 1 of the legs to his tracksuit bottoms. I thought to myself “maybe he has an itch that his tracksuits are preventing him from getting to”, as I continued to watch on…
“You see this mark?”
I drew in closer, “…..yeah?”
“I got stabbed init!”
This guy, clearly, was crazy! I’d never met someone like him before. I even asked him if he was mentally ok. How could someone the same age as me be involved, in things that I thought only happened in “Gangster” movies? Anyway, we continued conversing. We left the studio together, and went the same route home (well halfway).
I remember thinking to myself “He seems like a troubled kid. I wonder why he is the way that he is?” However, he had a likeable character. I somehow could feel that aside from his “road boy” behaviour, there was a good heart underneath.
Anyway, we exchanged contact. Spoke here and there, and then somehow lost contact for almost a year.
Eventually, we reconnected, “went out” for about 4-6 memorable months. Broke up, tried to give things a go on and off over the years, but it just never succeeded.
Fast-forward to our 20’s, I went to go and see him. This time he looked a little different. He was big, with thick locs. As he walked towards me, he gave me that same smile from when we 1st met. I returned the smile, before standing up to give him a hug. We sat down, and glanced into each others eyes. My eyes broke away, and slowly began to glare around the room. All the chatter started to eat away at my brain.
I never thought I’d see him again. Yet, here I was, visiting my 1st love, IN PRISON.
Check out part 2, tonight at 7pm.